A new year awaits!

wow!!!!!!!!!! 2010 is about to end and what a year it has been. a year of ups and downs,an interesting year if you as me and looking back at those days when i wanted to drown myself i look back with a nostalgic smile. This year has taught me so much and even if it has been emotionally tough for me (infact tough in most aspects of my life)i believe i am the stronger for it. I can actually say that i forgive my ex( i mean it) and even though there were days i cursed the day i met him,i came to the realisation that he actually was a nice guy and we did have some good times together. i Guess we were both immature and he is the wiser wherever he is.

Now ON TO THE FUN STUFF! I made a vow to myself during the festive season that i would catch my fun wherever i found it, i must say i did find fun and i met the MOST OBNOXIOUS MAN on earth. Really awoof they run belle! He was loud,uncouth and totally razz and insisted on not paying a dime to enter the beach because he is from the royal family and the end of the day he wasn't. MY GOD! I wanted to throttle him and all because we needed someone to drive us to the beach.Next time i take a cab....

Anyway the new year is coming and i hope with better opportunities and I wish us all a happy one!

ciao!!!!!!!!!!

The Ultimate Transversite

Hi guys!
its been a while, an emotional couple of weeks for me,filled with triumphs and disappointments,more disappointments, if you ask me. Anyway i have decided not to moan about my life anymore and focus on stuff that catch my fancy because seriously moaning doesn't take you anywhere.

In Nigeria there's this reality TV show called 'Gulder Ultimate search' kind of like 'The Survivor.' I am sure you must have heard of that one at least. its sponsored by Gulder, a brand of beer brewed by the Nigerian breweries.Its been a success so far and and am sure resulted into a huge pay day for not only the manufacturers of the brand but all the people that have worked on the idea for the past couple of years. The reality show is usually set in a remote forest or patch of land(they should consider the dessert one of these days)and a group of young men and women are abandoned there and expected to survive living in the wild at the same time tackling different physical and mental tasks giving to them.One after the other people are eliminated until it remains a three individuals(men of course), after a gruelling task of physical and mental capabilities,an ultimate man is chosen.

Now that lies my problem! Notice i SAID ultimate man not woman. How in the world do they expect women to compete fairly against men,especially physically fit men with rippling muscles. I know what men can do women can do better,but not in carrying heavy bags of sand uphill. Maybe women stand a chance if its just mental tasks but women(am sorry but i have to say this) are not as physically strong as men, scientifically it has been proven.Then to add insult to injury there's a price for last woman standing! That means the organisers had no intention of letting a woman have a spitting chance in the first place. The just concluded one was called ' the Ultimate Hero' hero! not heroine! i think that they should stop deluding us and use only male contestants and make a separate concept strictly for women.

i think that's only fair!

this close to tears

Have you ever been so down that the slightest thing could move you to tears. that even a sentimental song on the radio can make you cry . well for the past 3 weeks i have been going through an emotional roller coaster. i have felt lust,anger,sadness,happiness,anxiety and jealousy that i wonder how a human being can experience such feeling in huge proportions and not explode.
i wont deny that i feel very lonely right now and totally clueless on what i want. I wont deny that i need a male presence in my life but i feel that when that male presence does come,am not emotionally ready for it and something good will pass me by. i cant deny that i have a lot of baggage and there's nothing worse than making someone carry your baggage for you. i just hope that this wretched stage passes soon and i can begin to smile from within not the one pasted on my face.

hey peeps! hope you all had a wonderful weekend and some rest. I did and i had so much fun...and rest which is more important.

last week Friday, i was a little depressed and upset,so i decided to check up on a friend. when i got to her house,a friend called and asked her to come over to hang out(male friend i might add). since i have decided to have my fun where i find it ,i decided to tag along. we got to the bar/lounge on the mainland and ordered drinks(or rather they did and i drank my coke). we where having fun just gisting and drinking when this dude,came by and started harassing me.

First of,he's married and was with friends and he was tipsy! He had the effrontery to try pick me up and his wedding band was gleaming on his finger. i know some girls don't mind,but i did! Anyway one of his friends apologised on his behalf and i let it slide.All in all minus the annoying gnat! i had fun...hope you all did.

Absolute crap!

once a again i am hear to rant and rave about the F up's! of men or rather the human race in general. for the sake of privacy and because i do not want to butchered in my sleep,i wont mention names.... i promise!

i guess u all know about my very painful break up with my boyfriend of many years. it hurt,i cried,i cursed bla bla bla,moving on...Anyway after a while i started to get back to my old self and i wanted to dip my toe in the dating pool,with disastrous results. i want to mention a particular guy in general,lets call him Mr x. I and Mr x have known each other for quite a while but lost contact for a couple of years. Thanks to our wonderful social networking sites we reconnected and started exchanging mails,IM's and finally phone calls. He was sounding good on paper and was talking the talk. HE also expressed a desire to relocate to our fatherland(did i mention he lives abroad)as a dutiful friend and potential girlfriend to be.I advised him on how to prepare for all the pitfalls present in our business climate here and warned him to be sure if that was what he wanted to do.Little did i know i was giving ammunition for another day.

Imade the fatal mistake of asking him for money,just once! which i never do and still hate myself for doing and it was because of desperation. he suddenly kept of and when i confronted him,he began to spew(God knows where he came up with)tales of my negativity and how i never encouraged him on his business ventures and that he has decided to stay away.

can you believe that crap!Anyway i am at my wits end with men and frankly i think ill take my toe out of the pool,find a chair and lounge by the single side of the pool till whene

Being Single Rocks or Sucks?

OK! I have been single for the past 6 months and i wont lie its been a mixture and roller coaster of emotions.Right now, i dont know if i should be glad or sad.

When i broke up with my ex, i had a myriad of feelings; anger,sadness and strangely a feeling of relief and excitement! Relief that all my months of feeling unappreciated and neglected and plain unhappy was coming to an end and excitement that there had to be better things ahead of me. I did the normal,i shed tears,lost a lot of weight,deleted all his numbers,pictures and every source of communication between us,and went on a complete physical renovation.After the weeks of self neglect,i started taking better care of myself and went on a mad shopping binge! Now i realise it was all in the bid to make myself happy.

A few weeks later,i heard my ex had started dating someone else and then began the downward spiral.Maybe at the back of my mind,i was nursiing some small ray of hope that we would get back together,that after a few weeks he would realise that he couldn't live without me. Oh well...i didnt see that coming and i guess it was just the kick in the butt i needed.

Now months down the line, i can say the dating scene has not been encouraging AT ALL! I have gone on the worst dates you can imagine,i have met the most 'disturbing guys' for lack of a better descriptive word.Cheapskates,skanks,jerks,retards,you name it, i have seen it. It makes me look back with nolstagia,the days i cried because of my boyfriend,the akward moments with his family, the no money so lets stay at home dates(you had to be understanding).

Anyway,like the good soldier i am, i have to make the best of everything. I have to make being single look sexy! Ihave to look hot at all times and go on dates that id rather not go to(are there any good guys anymore?)

I have something to look forward to anyway.tomorrow is a friday and am hanging out with the girls! its guaranteed to be fun and i cant wait.Maybe ill catch me a hot guy whose employed,employable or an employer.....tata!

mummy knows best

has any young woman or girl felt like dropping their mothers off a cliff. come on say the truth,you know u have. I have on several occasions and i know its a sin but i just cant help it. i am sure that even mothers feel the same way about their children regardless of all the 'a mothers love is the best' and a woman can give up her life for her child. trust me,sometimes mothers want to take that life.

what i want to talk about is the animosity that's usually present among mothers and daughters. women usually pray to God, to be blessed with at least one daughter.how come when they reach a certain age they cant see eye to eye with their mothers. mothers and daughters always seem to be at each others throats concerning so many issues:cloths,friends,cooking,going out and the most important boys.

i can remember an incident when a friend of mine came to visit me at home. my mum didn't like her because she looked to streetwise and would probably 'sell me and collect change'. another one was when a male friend came to check my elder sister and my mum almost walked him out because he didn't greet her in the proper Yoruba fashion. these are just a few in many occurrences where i and my sister probably wanted to kill our mum.

now that my sis is married with a kid,she and my mum get along so much better and swap mummy notes. as for me i can now broach a topic that was taboo to her before....men! i guess because am older.

word of advice to teenage girls out there. even if your mum may be on your case now,she actually loves you and doesn't want you to make mistakes that she did,in her day.believe me one day you will both sit down and talk about all the topics u cant approach her about now.

and when the time comes and you have your own daughters and you act the same way,she will probably want to shoot u then too!