Thursday, March 31, 2016

Water under the Bridge

Hi Guys,


Almost a year since i updated my blog. The last time i was here, was when i was planning my wedding and thankfully that has been done and dusted.

So i am now married, AKA i am now called Mrs Alaka.  Another new development, i changed jobs. A lot can happen in less than a year right? So i have a new last name and i am slaving away at another desk and company.

My former colleagues were more than happy for me when i told them i was leaving. For me it was a bitter sweet feeling because i have this believe that jobs really at the end of the day are the same. I call it 'the same shit,different toilet' syndrome. Basically you are going to go through the same crap you went through at a different company ( Pressure, targets and all that..) the upside is, you might be making more money than before and probably be in a higher position. So that should reduce the sting a bit.

Image result for fighting married couples

Marriage is a whole new kettle of fish. Women are always such in a rush to get that ring and are so fooled by the romance and the glamour of social media and wedding sites that you forget it goes beyond that day. When the food has been eaten, the liquor guzzled and the guests and family members have gone home. It will be just you and that man and depending on how the planning of the wedding went and all the drama that ensued from it, will dictate the tone of the journey that has begun. Nobody wants to start a marriage filled with resentment, alas that happens many times.

Also, that man that was willing to eat '' Indomie and Egg' three nights in a row has officially died. Sweet heart, shit just got REAL! This is now your '' Husband'' and no longer '' Boyfriend' and many men think this is a license to officially boss you around and show you who is the '' Baale ile'' i.e Head of the home.

However, marriage can be sweet. I love the fact that i have a man in my life that i can confide in. It's his duty to take care of me now and my responsibility to make our house a home. I am more than happy to leave the leadership role to him, believe me. My feminist views no reach that side. Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown. I am the neck and that is also a very important role in the home.

Did i also mention that i have a willing partner to ''DO'' and Undo when i feel like it and there is no Guilt involved? That should wear out though in a couple of years and when the kids arrive.

All in all, its been a great ride so far.

Till next time.

Live,love and Laugh 

Friday, June 26, 2015

The blushing bride to be

Hi Guys,

How have you been?

I will not apologize about my not updating in a while, its getting old. So ill just get on with it.

So as we all know, i am getting married in about 4 months and though preparations have started. Even though it has not really gotten any momentum yet, am already stressed. It's just not about the money, its the whole planning, the tension, the finding vendors and basically not killing your Fiance in the process.

Last week was dedicated to getting booking a make up artist and must i say it was dramatic. I did not know that the make up business was this lucrative at least for the MUA who know what they are doing. I swear am tempted to resign and go for a training at the house of Tara, learn the Art ( yes its an art) and once i have established myself starting charging from 100k upwards.

Image result for make up application cartoon

Am not joking these ladies are charging a whooping 100k for their work. Now, now before some people start knocking me, am not judging oooo, haba its their profession, it takes skill and dedication to learn it and if they want to charge 100k upwards, by all means they should. Those that can afford them, will patronize them. Unfortunately for me, i have very high taste and food wey sweat, na money cook am. If i want the Banke Meshida magic wand, then by all means, i have to pay for it. However, my taste does not match my pocket, so i have to be smart, if i can't get Banke, ill get her distant cousin, who is just as good but at a lesser cost.  That does not mean, she won't charge 100k one day for another bride but it just WON'T be me and i intend on getting married only once by God's grace.

In other news, its the holy month of Ramadan and we are on the 9th Day, Allahamdulilahi! May Allah make it easy for us. I am also done with my Master's degree, I just finished my 3rd semester exams, so i just have one semester left and my project and i am done! Whoop! Whoop!

That's been my life in a nutshell...oh i forgot that work just got a whole lot crazier and i have more responsibilities ( it's like a promotion but i am not excited). Anyway, i am trying to be more positive about life and keep the smile on.

Till next time...whenever that is.

Live, Love and Laugh

Monday, May 4, 2015

Monday Musings

Hi Guys,

How have you been? Its been eons right? I am not going to go on and on about why i have not updated my blog in a bit... Life happens and there is only so much a girl can handle.

As we all know, i am getting married this year and let me say that planning a wedding is not for the faint of heart. Especially, when your father is not Dangote and you don't even have a father and your mother is quite an emotional handful. Its been draining i tell you.

Even though the wedding has been scheduled for the last quarter of the year, i must say that it has started giving me sleepless nights. I really really want to do this my way and on a budget.

Getting a hall has been dramatic with everyone wanting their way and at the same time being cost conscious. Oga also wants his opinions to be heard and has his own 2 cents to be thrown in. Combined with mum and the in-laws, its enough to drive a girl crazy but i will survive.

So with everything i have going on; doing my masters, planning a wedding, working full time at a quite demanding job, trying to be a good and dutiful daughter, an attentive Fiancee', blogging and being a good friend has been quite low on my list. I try to keep in touch with my friends though via BBM ( at least am trying).

Image result for Stressed out black female executive

I know its going to be fine and everything will fall into place.

In other news, Floyd Mayweather made $179 million and change in one night. Let's keep that in mind while we go to work....for Other people.

Have a great week ahead

Live, Love and Laugh

Monday, March 23, 2015

The Myth of Work, Life Balance

Hi Guys,

Promises, Promises but i keep failing to keep them. So much, for my a blog post per week, pledge, but life has a way of just messing with your plans. We plan, God laughs.

Its been a crazy couple of weeks, at the office and in my personal life as well. It seems the pressure has been increased tenfold and everyone is on edge. Nothing causes strife and tension as much as money matters. Even though, i am not at Liberty to talk about stuff that happens in the office, professionalism and all that. I can say this though, it has not been fun. Infact, of late, i am questioning many things but all i can do is show up,dig in and do my job to the best of my ability even though it feels like its all for naught.  

Image result for the myth of work life balance

Yesterday, a thought popped into my mind, while i having sunday evening blues ( By the way, that is some cause for alarm though). Is work, life balance a myth created by the Corporate world to keep people chained to their desk, for a major part of their lives? If we look at this objectively, when something is supposed to be balanced, is it not supposed to be 50 50? So from the get go, they lied to us. You spend 5 days a week at work and two days to rest, so duh! where is the balance? Should i mention over time and the fact that you are required to work weekends sometimes? So where is the balance i ask you? So when, i see HR professionals come and preach the work,life balance gospel to me, i just scoff and roll my eyes. In Nigeria, you are crucified for leaving your office at 5.30PM when that was what was written on your employment letter. According to some organisations, it does not show commitment. I could go on and on about how work,life balance at least in Private organisations. I think its a mirage and i would appreciate if they could just be honest and tell it as it is, not talk from both sides of the mouth.

Enough ranting about the Injustice dished to the Labour force in Nigeria. Its a very important week for the country as a whole. It's the countdown to the Elections ( Yipee!). You ask why i jubilate? I just want this elections, over and done with. I just want to move on with my life. Even though, the first quarter is always slow, this first quarter has been a total waste, business wise. Everything has gone to hell and it seems the economy just plummeted. Exchange rate has been more epileptic than power supply, and power supply has been non existent. In other news, electricity tariff was reduced by 50%.....hahahahahahah...They really insult our intelligence in this country. These elections should just come and go.

I finally had my introduction ceremony and i am so grateful to God, that it was a huge success. It even turned out better than i thought. I could not have done it without the financial and moral support of family and friends. The prayers worked and to think i was so stressed out, everybody who really cared and loved me, did their bit to make the day what it was. Alhamdulilahi! Pictures of the day, will come soon...You know i love to share.

Let's try and enjoy the week. Please stock up on food stuffs in preparation for the election, we don't know what may happen because some stupid young men, who have cotton wool instead of brains have been fighting. For the life of me, i cannot understand. These people you are fighting for, their children are abroad ooooo. For how much?  It is well....

Live,love and Laugh

Friday, February 27, 2015

Smiling when it hurts

Hi Guys,

It almost happened again.  The not blogging frequently. Its been carrrraaaaaazy. Work just gets crazier and crazier and i feel like am working on egg shells. I also launched a new pixie cut as well, Finally!

That's it Folks. 

Have a great weekend.

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

That kind of Tuesday

Hi Guys,

Its my second post. I am trying to keep my promise even though it seems harder today. This weekend went by faster than a bullet train. Sunday was cool because i managed to spend time with Oga and i went to bed on time. He loves to stay active and he loves to swim. In this weather, swimming seems quite necessary but for the life of me, i can't. He has tried to teach me, really he has but i guess, some people are not swimmers and i fall into that category. May we never have a Tsunami in Nigeria and may i never be lost at sea ( am black,so fat chance of that happening, we don't like  large bodies of water, if its not a pool, except for the riverine folk)

Monday came and everything went down hill from there. My mood just took a dive and i have not been able to pluck it back up and combine that with car trouble, then you get the picture. It's one of those days, when i feel utterly and totally overwhelmed with all the stuff i have to do.  My sister told me to take a deep breath and just calm down but its harder than it looks.

Anyway, i have been told not to dwell on negativity and keep my chin up and at the end of the day, it won't look and feel so bad. Oh! and INEC has moved election day 6 weeks forward....hehehehehehehe ( sorry to the guys, who were looking forward to that excuse)

Here are some pictures from Sunday

Enjoy the rest of the week.

Live love and Laugh

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Am Back

Hi Guys,

This is my first post in almost a year and am i glad to be back. I really did not want to stop writing but when life happens, there is really so much you can do about it. I must say that since the last time i posted anything, things have been quite eventful and i am sooooo grateful to God. My life has been moving forward at a steady,slow but purposeful pace. Everything that has happened, happened at the right time, when God willed it to be so. There have been challenges, but God never gives you what you cannot handle.

The ironic thing is that a lot of people asked me why i stopped writing and trust me there was no particular reason than the fact, that i have been more busy and at the same time with more focus on where i am going  in life. What spurred this post, you might ask? A client of mine, Nic Van der Bergh,mentioned that he visited my blog and that i should start writing again. That's it! Nothing special, i just happened to be a bit less busy and i decided to go for it. I love writing, it's my thing, my therapy, my shrink, i can express myself with words and i love to share. I am a people's person, a communicator at heart and i have decided that NO MATTER, how crazy my life is and is going to be in 2015 ( i have made this promise before, i know) i will really make an effort to write more. Not because i can make money from it ( Bloggers are making money darn!) but because i just love to write and where else than my online diary/blog.

So what's been new in my life?

  • I am half way through with my master's degree. Its been a challenge and interesting at the same time. Not only, have i pushed myself but i realize that i can actually, gasp! tackle calculations. Not your good old arithmetic, but full blown nightmare inspiring maths. I came across stuff like correlation, regression,weighted average and many of their terrible cousins. Not only did i come across them, i actually mastered some of them like my boo ' Exponential Smoothing'. Am i now a mathematician? Can horses fly? However, after sleepless nights, numerous pimples and shedding of tears, i wrote the exams. I don't expect an A but can they just let me pass and get my degree? 
  • Am engaged!!! Let me say it again.... I oluwatobi Kafayat Rasaq is engaged to my boo, lover and best friend I can now call him my Fiance, not boo. His name is Mobolaji Alaka and am proud to mention his name finally! So many boo's have passed under the bridge. No more tales of dates from hell. We are not married yet, but by God grace, its happening. The proposal was sweet and romantic and was an Xmas proposal ( i suspected small sha) but was still pleasantly surprised because he managed to get my friends to witness the whole thing.My Family members knew waaaaaay before me, and he actually asked for my mum's permission.  So we are getting married this year, Insha Allah, we just need to pick a date, after the 'momi mo e' i.e Introduction of the families, which should come next month,God willing. 
So many other things, have happened but those are the two i think that are worth boring you with. This month  is also quite an interesting month for Nigeria. It's both Valentine and Election all rolled into one. Now that i think of it, i actually miss expressing myself on this platform about the election and what i think about the parties and candidates. Just a tip though.... I still am a little mixed about who to vote for but i know who i am NOT going to Vote for....President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan. I did not vote for him the first time and am not going to start now. I am just done with the administration and i just want them to leave..Go bye bye. Enough is enough. 

Then these demons called ISIS? They are just vicious,rabid dogs and give my religion a bad name and i pray that every sane Muslim out there, stands up and renounces their ideology. Their latest atrocity leaves me astounded. I have never been able to bring myself to watch any of their videos. They are Barbaric and Ungodly and do not, i repeat, stand for what Islam is about. Everybody needs to stand up and put a stop to this. This includes, Boko Haram in Nigeria as well. The chibok girls are still no where to be found and i shudder to think about the fate of those young women and if they can ever be normal again, at least the ones that survive.  

*Taking a deep breath* I guess this is a good start as any to my writing. Ill keep the posts coming and i am actually excited about writing again. Here are some pics of moi, i think i have put on a little weight...


Have a great one Guys! 

Live,Love and Laugh always.