Hi Guys,
I am a very happy/Sad woman today! Why? Yesterday was my birthday and i am a year older. Yes i am happy to be alive,healthy and there are many things i should be thankful for but there is still this small nagging voice in my head that says stuff like 'You are growing older meaning you are closer to the grave. Are you on track with your life? Have you achieved all your set goals for this particular age?'
As exciting as birthday's are with the well wishes and birthday greetings flooding in, i always start my birthday a bit down. It happens every year and as the day progresses i get better,more excited and am generally a happier person. My birthdays for me are always very bitter sweet and at one time in the day, i always cry, EVERY YEAR! What is wrong with me? This year i cried while observing my morning Salat and i cried when my mum prayed for me. The tears were a mixture of gratitude for where i am and where i am coming from and fear and trepidation for what this new year might bring.
Between my last birthday and this one, it has been quite eventful. Filled with laughs and tears and so much anxiety, so i guess that's why i am even more fearful. Some people, even though they had my best interests at heart and did not mean any harm, cranked up the fears. ' Your next birthday will be in your husband's house' We will come for your wedding soon' etc. Really? I guess this is supposed to be the next chapter in my life, marriage and kids. Do not get me wrong,just like every girl out there, i have constantly dreamed of my wedding day and i can't wait to leave my mum's house and make a home for myself. However the cynical side of me knows its not all rainbows and sunshine in a man's house. Shit gets real,real fast in marriage. No more doing as i like, going out, deciding if i want to cook or not etc In essence, you are no longer the boss of your life. When children enter the picture, it even gets more complicated. Well, i guess the most constant thing in life is change and i just have to accept it. By Gods grace, i will be a Wife and mother,one day soon and as women before me have done it, i will manage.
To lighter stuff, in the spirit of making me happy and enjoying my birthday week. I made sure i took some 'Pre Birthday selfies' and took some more for my birthday. Here they are...
Now to my birthday, it really turned out ok. I made cupcakes for myself because i always make a cake for myself ( Independent woman stuvs). I do not believe in waiting for a guy to celebrate me, i celebrate myself. However, lee boo still sent a cake to my office ( kisses) and to my surprise so did my office. Le Boo also had a custom made card for me. He also promised to give me my gift over the weekend.
Lee boo was upset that the my office cake and his was almost identical. It was from the same place ' Cakes and Cream', those guys really really need to step up their game. I told him it was the thought that counts and gave him tips on where next to get my cakes from. Boo isn't a cake guy...love him still.
Till next time folks
Live love and Laugh
I am a very happy/Sad woman today! Why? Yesterday was my birthday and i am a year older. Yes i am happy to be alive,healthy and there are many things i should be thankful for but there is still this small nagging voice in my head that says stuff like 'You are growing older meaning you are closer to the grave. Are you on track with your life? Have you achieved all your set goals for this particular age?'
As exciting as birthday's are with the well wishes and birthday greetings flooding in, i always start my birthday a bit down. It happens every year and as the day progresses i get better,more excited and am generally a happier person. My birthdays for me are always very bitter sweet and at one time in the day, i always cry, EVERY YEAR! What is wrong with me? This year i cried while observing my morning Salat and i cried when my mum prayed for me. The tears were a mixture of gratitude for where i am and where i am coming from and fear and trepidation for what this new year might bring.
Between my last birthday and this one, it has been quite eventful. Filled with laughs and tears and so much anxiety, so i guess that's why i am even more fearful. Some people, even though they had my best interests at heart and did not mean any harm, cranked up the fears. ' Your next birthday will be in your husband's house' We will come for your wedding soon' etc. Really? I guess this is supposed to be the next chapter in my life, marriage and kids. Do not get me wrong,just like every girl out there, i have constantly dreamed of my wedding day and i can't wait to leave my mum's house and make a home for myself. However the cynical side of me knows its not all rainbows and sunshine in a man's house. Shit gets real,real fast in marriage. No more doing as i like, going out, deciding if i want to cook or not etc In essence, you are no longer the boss of your life. When children enter the picture, it even gets more complicated. Well, i guess the most constant thing in life is change and i just have to accept it. By Gods grace, i will be a Wife and mother,one day soon and as women before me have done it, i will manage.
To lighter stuff, in the spirit of making me happy and enjoying my birthday week. I made sure i took some 'Pre Birthday selfies' and took some more for my birthday. Here they are...
Till next time folks
Live love and Laugh
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